I write at the kitchen table. This is cleaner than it usually is. That's my favorite iPad app, SimpleMind on the left.

Where I Write

Where do I write?

I don’t have a desk. I bought a desk last year and tried to make a writing station for myself, but my apartment has a serious lack of space. I got rid of it because there was no real place for it, and it was too small to fit my laptop and wireless  ergonomic keyboard, which I need, because I can’t stand typing on a laptop. Instead I write at the proverbial kitchen table. It’s not my ideal writing space, but it’s what I have room for unless I want to buy another desk and try to squish it where it doesn’t fit again.

It’s not bad, the kitchen table is near the window. I only wish I could find a way to keep Oliver from attacking me every few minutes when I’m sitting there. He has a specific routine. He stares at me for awhile, then if I don’t pay attention to him, he growls. Then he sneezes. Then he growls again. Then he barks. Then he jumps up and bites my sleeve. It’s a bit distracting.

So sometimes it takes forever to, say, write about the dream I had last night because the dog won’t stop attacking me. Last night, I dreamed that as I was driving my car, I dumped a bottle of balsamic vinegar all over the interior of it. This was, (And now Oliver has started violently attacking me, probably because he has to poop. I took him out. Indeed, he pooped. Also, now he’s mad at me because I made him spit out the grody piece of bread he picked up near the dumpster and was intent on carrying around with him until the end of Time.), strange because I don’t really like balsamic vinegar.

I even said, “but I don’t even like balsamic vinegar.” And then I couldn’t clean it up because I couldn’t find a place to park. I don’t know why I even had it in the first place. A whole bunch of boring stuff happened, and then I found myself eating a really messy burger and was dripping mayonnaisey sauce all over me.

So actually, I tried an experiment and typed this in front of the TV while watching episodes of Red Dwarf that I’ve seen several times, and it’s taken me all afternoon because I keep getting distracted. So I guess writing in front of the TV is not a good idea.

I eat on my coffee table in front of the TV, surrounded by books I'm not currently reading, a box I should have thrown away weeks ago, and Oliver's favorite hump toy, the snake.

I eat on my coffee table in front of the TV, surrounded by books I’m not currently reading, a box I should have thrown away weeks ago, and Oliver’s favorite hump toy, the snake.

Oliver steak

Sometimes this happens.

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